We all know two or three friends with whom we have gone to
school together, graduated, parted to start our different journeys and never
lost complete touch. In our forties now, some of those couples have got married
and had children, some have been married and divorced, and some maintain that
they are still looking and have still not found the right person yet. The irony
is that those very people who say they have not found the right one yet, have
probably had the most attributes and qualities to have found a good partner.
What then is the problem? Why are they still single and lonely? What is the new
excuse now? Nobody seems to be good enough. No one makes it past the dinner
drinks. When the last sip is taken they are already ruing the next day and
thinking of what a bother it is.
Getting a grip
·
If you are happy with your single life and truly
don’t want a partner, and mean it, perhaps you are telling the truth and you do
not have to read articles on subjects you secretly want to know about.
·
Maybe you are even aware of your situation and
are trying to fix it. Have you spoken to a psychologist? Do you dread the
thought of a man in your life? Is there some past history which you should look
into that is holding you back?
·
Have you been in a relationship with a man that
you really liked and wanted to be part of his life, and he left you, and you
still don’t understand what happened? Deep down you know.
·
Do you have unrealistic expectations? Do you
want a man to wait on you hand and foot? Do you play games and withhold sex if
you can’t get what you want? This is a favorite tactic of some women; they feel
powerful when they get the upper hand.
News for you
Men know instinctively when they meet a woman for the first
time what she gives up; meaning, is she a first-night kisser, is she anxious to
be liked, is she desperate, does she put out on the first date, or is she cool
and slow and easy and don’t take things for granted until they’ve been proven
to her. Some of these reasons are why many people are in failed relationships
and many too have not yet said marital vows. It is all right to be vulnerable;
it means you do not know everything. The best way forward is to make a list of
what you truly fear, see a psychologist, and then prepare a positive life plan
which includes having a man in your life. If you come across desperate, men
will sense that and take off. Remember, they are human beings too and have
their fears.
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